I had the best birthday weekend.
Girls' night out with some of my mama friends on Friday night. Saturday evening, I got to go on a little shopping spree and picked up a couple of pairs of jeans, several tops and sweaters, fabulous! On Sunday, my actual actual birthday, Matt and I went to the first movie (in a THEATER) that we had seen since Leo's birth. It may have been the first film I've watched in its entirety since then, too, not sure. It was "The Grey." Kind of a dark, violent, twisted reintroduction to moviegoing. I loved it. We held hands and cuddled in the theater and ate popcorn. And on Sunday evening, we got to go out for a fancy dinner at one of our favorite places, Mangiamo, in Manhattan Beach. Sexy sexy Italian, yum. Matt gave me a spa day gift certificate. YEAH!
And, the cherry on top of the icing on the 32nd birthday cake: A quiet Monday morning shopping trip to Nordstrom's, by myself, to get fitted for real bras, not nursing bras, not sports bras. Real, nice, pretty, comfy bras, with no snap at the armpit. Brought to me by a sweet girl who measured me and everything.
On my 30th birthday, I was in kind of an unhappy place, dealing with a little depression, not happy in my job at all. It was a hard birthday. Last year, we spent my birthday at the La-Z-Boy store, recliner shopping, with a 6-week-old wrapped in a Moby on Matt's torso and/or being breastfed in the backseat of our car...I was happy but exhausted, confused, anxious, unsure of myself. This year, I feel like I am exactly where I was meant to be. I love where we live. I have wonderful, supportive, fun friends. I am crazy in love with my husband. Our son is learning, growing, healthy, thriving, and so attached to Matt and I. I have a nice routine down in my daily life as a stay-at-home-mother and have truly grown into the role - I know how to push through the daily struggles that are so hard when you are a brand-new mom - and I know that nothing is permanent. I have become a much better and more consistent cook than I used to be - and more confident. I can prepare dinner with my toddler-baby at my feet. I am striving to be healthy and take care of my own body, something which is a constant struggle for me, but I am working on it. Physically, I am somehow more flexible than I was pre-baby and I am using this change to my advantage, trying to get into a more regular home yoga practice.
I am truly, truly happy.
Also, happy 36th anniversary to my incredible parents. I love you so much.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Dear Leo.
I am kind of overwhelmed by it tonight, and just had to tell you how very much I love you. I don't know if I really have the words to describe it, but I will try.
We were alone most of the day; your papa is on swing shifts right now so he sleeps late. When he got up, he took us to brunch and then we walked around the Redondo Beach pier and you chased seagulls. Then we came home and the three of us wrestled and cuddled and played in the living room. I kept you awake as long as I could because I wanted you to enjoy being with Papa.
After he left for work around three, you surprised me by taking a long, late second nap and didn't wake up till 5pm! You usually get up by four at the latest, and usually even earlier, so I knew tonight would be a late-bedtime kind of night.
You didn't take a bath until almost eight (you usually bathe around 630) and didn't go to sleep until after 830. You were up a lot last night and I was rocking you, so I am really tired tonight and I was looking forward to having lots of "me" time after you went to bed to watch a movie, relax, et cetera.
Instead I am up blogging about you and posting this quick picture I snapped tonight of you wrapped up all cozy in your towel after your bath. Because you've been asleep for not quite an hour, and I miss you.
That's how much I love you. Now I am going to watch my movie!
[addendum: I just found this picture, taken one year ago today - out to brunch with Papa! Probably your very first trip out to brunch - five weeks old! I had to add it to this post/love letter.]
We were alone most of the day; your papa is on swing shifts right now so he sleeps late. When he got up, he took us to brunch and then we walked around the Redondo Beach pier and you chased seagulls. Then we came home and the three of us wrestled and cuddled and played in the living room. I kept you awake as long as I could because I wanted you to enjoy being with Papa.
After he left for work around three, you surprised me by taking a long, late second nap and didn't wake up till 5pm! You usually get up by four at the latest, and usually even earlier, so I knew tonight would be a late-bedtime kind of night.
You didn't take a bath until almost eight (you usually bathe around 630) and didn't go to sleep until after 830. You were up a lot last night and I was rocking you, so I am really tired tonight and I was looking forward to having lots of "me" time after you went to bed to watch a movie, relax, et cetera.
Instead I am up blogging about you and posting this quick picture I snapped tonight of you wrapped up all cozy in your towel after your bath. Because you've been asleep for not quite an hour, and I miss you.
That's how much I love you. Now I am going to watch my movie!
[addendum: I just found this picture, taken one year ago today - out to brunch with Papa! Probably your very first trip out to brunch - five weeks old! I had to add it to this post/love letter.]
Friday, February 10, 2012
Au naturel
Disclaimer: This post may or may not be about baby poop. If you find that sort of thing gross, I suggest you mosey along. If you have a child yourself, you will probably find this amusing.
Tonight.
Matt is at work. Around 645, I removed Leo's diaper; as per our usual evening routine, I let him run around the house diaper-free for a few minutes while I prepared his pajamas, bath, etc.
Oops! I noticed a small puddle on the floor. Gross! No worries, pee happens, I quickly wiped it up and cleaned the floor with vinegar while he ran into the hallway and kept playing. I silently praised myself for my green-cleaning choice. "A little pee is no problem, think of how wonderful it is for my son to have this time to just run free. Maybe I'm the best mom ever!"
A few minutes later, I walked into the hallway to grab something and I felt my foot hit it. Another puddle? I looked down and a long-held nightmare stared me in the face. Poop. On the rug. On my foot. POOOOOOP ON MY FOOT.
I looked up and there was my sweet boy, running through the living room, happily oblivious to the shame of human nature. I stood for about five seconds too long with my foot hovering in the air while I decided whether I should chase him or hop into the bathroom to wash my foot. Those five seconds were all he needed to brown-bomb the living room, as well (though, thankfully, floor only). I hobbled into his room, grabbed a wipe, quickly cleaned off my foot and grabbed a dirty sock out of the laundry basket in the hallway and put it on so I could chase him. He is usually fussy at diaper changes but I think he sensed my urgency as I tackled him and wiped him down before he could step in anything more and make the night even more hilarious.
Baby cleaned, I set out with bleach in hand (green cleaning? HAAAAA) and quickly cleaned the living room floor (Housekeeping tip: it IS safe to use bleach spray on hardwood floors! but only if you live in a rental), then oxycleaned the rugs while the baby sobbed for the oxyclean bottle (I just want to cleeeeeeaaaan, mommmmmmmmm). I then scrubbed the rug spots with a rag and then finished by mopping the living room.
I threw in the towel and joined him during baby bath time. So we're all clean and poop-free. The real test will be tonight at 4am when Matt gets home from work. If he does not detect the stench of baby naked time, oxyclean and I will consider our evening a relative success.
RIP, Baby Naked Time.
Tonight.
Matt is at work. Around 645, I removed Leo's diaper; as per our usual evening routine, I let him run around the house diaper-free for a few minutes while I prepared his pajamas, bath, etc.
Oops! I noticed a small puddle on the floor. Gross! No worries, pee happens, I quickly wiped it up and cleaned the floor with vinegar while he ran into the hallway and kept playing. I silently praised myself for my green-cleaning choice. "A little pee is no problem, think of how wonderful it is for my son to have this time to just run free. Maybe I'm the best mom ever!"
A few minutes later, I walked into the hallway to grab something and I felt my foot hit it. Another puddle? I looked down and a long-held nightmare stared me in the face. Poop. On the rug. On my foot. POOOOOOP ON MY FOOT.
I looked up and there was my sweet boy, running through the living room, happily oblivious to the shame of human nature. I stood for about five seconds too long with my foot hovering in the air while I decided whether I should chase him or hop into the bathroom to wash my foot. Those five seconds were all he needed to brown-bomb the living room, as well (though, thankfully, floor only). I hobbled into his room, grabbed a wipe, quickly cleaned off my foot and grabbed a dirty sock out of the laundry basket in the hallway and put it on so I could chase him. He is usually fussy at diaper changes but I think he sensed my urgency as I tackled him and wiped him down before he could step in anything more and make the night even more hilarious.
Baby cleaned, I set out with bleach in hand (green cleaning? HAAAAA) and quickly cleaned the living room floor (Housekeeping tip: it IS safe to use bleach spray on hardwood floors! but only if you live in a rental), then oxycleaned the rugs while the baby sobbed for the oxyclean bottle (I just want to cleeeeeeaaaan, mommmmmmmmm). I then scrubbed the rug spots with a rag and then finished by mopping the living room.
I threw in the towel and joined him during baby bath time. So we're all clean and poop-free. The real test will be tonight at 4am when Matt gets home from work. If he does not detect the stench of baby naked time, oxyclean and I will consider our evening a relative success.
RIP, Baby Naked Time.
Sunday, January 22, 2012
How's the blogging going?
...my husband said to me, teasing me, the other day. Yeah, I have not posted in quite some time. I mean to, and I feel like I have a lot of thoughts and a lot to say but I just don't have the words.
Leo's babyhood is passing so quickly. So suddenly, he is one year old. He's been walking for two and a half months, he has weaned, and he comprehends and responds to so many things that we say. For example, today I was dressing him, pulling a shirt over his head and helping him push his arms through the sleeves. He was holding a small toy. Out of habit, apparently, I said "Switch hands, please," and he did. And he does. Every time. I didn't know much about parenting before I had him, but I decided early on to try to talk him through as much of the day as possible because I knew that at some point he would understand. I'm so glad I did that.
He doesn't say many words yet, still just "kitty" (dee-tee) and (sporadically) "mama" or "papa" or some form of "grandma/grandpa/nana/granddad" (deh-deh). But he knows so many words that we say and he makes animal noises, and repeats words that I say or noises that I make. When he sees the picture of my dad, he reaches out and makes a "tickling" motion at the picture ("tickle Grandpa's mustache"). When he sees a dog or hears the word "puppy," he pants like a dog. When he hears the word "Monkey," he yells "ah-ah-ah" (still working on the "oo-oo-oo," I guess). When he sees a snake, he makes sort of a vague "shcthhhschcccccshhh" sound like a hiss. When he sees a bird, he says "deet-deet-deet" - tweeting. Freaking adorable.
He dances. He dances like a madman. It is unbelievable. He whips his head from side to side with a real serious look on his face. He bounces at the knees and bumps his butt. He runs in place. It is very serious dancing. Every time he hears music. Every time.
Sometimes he sleeps through the night and it's awesome.
We love Leo. Leo loves us. When Matt leaves for work, Leo runs to the gate by the door and waves and yells "Dada!!! Dadaaaa!" Sometimes he cries, too, which is sad but also sweet. Yesterday we went to the beach. We saw our neighbor Eric from about thirty feet away and waved. Eric was carrying a surfboard. Leo smiled and yelled, "Dadaaaa!" He saw the board and thought it was his dad. Awwwww.
He is very affectionate with me and I love that.
Leo's babyhood is passing so quickly. So suddenly, he is one year old. He's been walking for two and a half months, he has weaned, and he comprehends and responds to so many things that we say. For example, today I was dressing him, pulling a shirt over his head and helping him push his arms through the sleeves. He was holding a small toy. Out of habit, apparently, I said "Switch hands, please," and he did. And he does. Every time. I didn't know much about parenting before I had him, but I decided early on to try to talk him through as much of the day as possible because I knew that at some point he would understand. I'm so glad I did that.
He doesn't say many words yet, still just "kitty" (dee-tee) and (sporadically) "mama" or "papa" or some form of "grandma/grandpa/nana/granddad" (deh-deh). But he knows so many words that we say and he makes animal noises, and repeats words that I say or noises that I make. When he sees the picture of my dad, he reaches out and makes a "tickling" motion at the picture ("tickle Grandpa's mustache"). When he sees a dog or hears the word "puppy," he pants like a dog. When he hears the word "Monkey," he yells "ah-ah-ah" (still working on the "oo-oo-oo," I guess). When he sees a snake, he makes sort of a vague "shcthhhschcccccshhh" sound like a hiss. When he sees a bird, he says "deet-deet-deet" - tweeting. Freaking adorable.
He dances. He dances like a madman. It is unbelievable. He whips his head from side to side with a real serious look on his face. He bounces at the knees and bumps his butt. He runs in place. It is very serious dancing. Every time he hears music. Every time.
Sometimes he sleeps through the night and it's awesome.
We love Leo. Leo loves us. When Matt leaves for work, Leo runs to the gate by the door and waves and yells "Dada!!! Dadaaaa!" Sometimes he cries, too, which is sad but also sweet. Yesterday we went to the beach. We saw our neighbor Eric from about thirty feet away and waved. Eric was carrying a surfboard. Leo smiled and yelled, "Dadaaaa!" He saw the board and thought it was his dad. Awwwww.
He is very affectionate with me and I love that.
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
All about Leo as he rolls up on eleven! months! holy! cow!
This post is sort of a "Mom's journal" of things I want to remember.
Leo:
-walks independently
-walks independently while carrying toys, even large toys
-falls gently
-catches himself
-walks fast
-turns fast
-feeds himself pretty much everything
-Opens and shuts anything that will open or shut
-Plays hide-and-seek
Leo loves:
-His parents
-turkey
-cheese
-pears
-apples (especially tasting/sucking on a peeled apple [relatively safe because he only has one tooth {and one more just coming in}])
-toast bites smeared with pureed fruit
-dancing
-Diana Damrau singing "O Zittre Nicht"
-Having his teeth brushed
-Being naked
-People. Everywhere. Everyone. Flirting.
-Knocking over towers that we build, and teasing us in the process, holding his hand up near the tower for several seconds and smiling before he taps it.
-Nursing, except for the last feed of the night - he will only take that by bottle (but will nurse for a few minutes after draining his bottle). This began happening because when he was really young he would nurse to sleep after just a few minutes, so I would "top him off" with a few ounces of pumped milk. After a while he only wanted the bottle. It hasn't seemed to make him want to nurse the rest of the time any less.
Leo does not love:
-diaper changes
-being dressed/undressed/messed with in this way in general
-Having his face wiped
-Being lotioned/PJ'ed after bath and before bed
Leo will, on demand:
-Dance
-Clap
-Do "So Big"
-Roll 'em up (as in Patty-cake)
-and Throw 'em in the oven
-Tickle Grandpa's mustache (or a picture of Grandpa's mustache)
-Gesture to something he wants (he's just starting to do this)
Leo communicates by:
-Signing for nursing (which also sometimes means "Mama" and "food" or "comfort" in general
-Shoving his face into my chest (loud and clear, yo)
-Waving "hello" or "goodbye"
Leo says:
-Ha (hi)
-Dehdeh (Mama)
-Dadadadada (Papa)
-Other forms of Dadadadadada while looking at or gesturing to a grandparent
-Also mimics a lot of things we say (the pitches/tones)
-Bbbbbbb (lip trills)
[I never really noticed a "first word," although my dad said he heard Leo say "Papa" to Matt. These are more like little sounds he makes that we just realized are specific in nature. Thus, um, words, I guess.]
Leo recognizes the words:
-Nurse
-Milk
-Hungry
-Mama
-Papa (matt)
-Grandma
-Grandpa
-Mustache (see "Grandpa")
-Nana
-Granddaddy
-Puppy
Leo has traveled to Minnesota (two flight legs) four times (twice just this month) and Texas three times. He is very good on a plane. I think he is so used to it that he just isn't fazed, even though he has just become so mobile.
Leo loves to be outside.
Leo loves dogs and most animals in general.
He sleeps through the night (12 hours) about 70% of the time. The rest of the time, he wakes around 1am and needs to be rocked, patted, or hugged back to sleep.
Leo is very emotional and sensitive. We usually know what is on his mind. He communicates his feelings, wants, desires loudly and with full emotion. He is very, very funny, very goofy, very fun. I really, really like him.
Leo:
-walks independently
-walks independently while carrying toys, even large toys
-falls gently
-catches himself
-walks fast
-turns fast
-feeds himself pretty much everything
-Opens and shuts anything that will open or shut
-Plays hide-and-seek
Leo loves:
-His parents
-turkey
-cheese
-pears
-apples (especially tasting/sucking on a peeled apple [relatively safe because he only has one tooth {and one more just coming in}])
-toast bites smeared with pureed fruit
-dancing
-Diana Damrau singing "O Zittre Nicht"
-Having his teeth brushed
-Being naked
-People. Everywhere. Everyone. Flirting.
-Knocking over towers that we build, and teasing us in the process, holding his hand up near the tower for several seconds and smiling before he taps it.
-Nursing, except for the last feed of the night - he will only take that by bottle (but will nurse for a few minutes after draining his bottle). This began happening because when he was really young he would nurse to sleep after just a few minutes, so I would "top him off" with a few ounces of pumped milk. After a while he only wanted the bottle. It hasn't seemed to make him want to nurse the rest of the time any less.
Leo does not love:
-diaper changes
-being dressed/undressed/messed with in this way in general
-Having his face wiped
-Being lotioned/PJ'ed after bath and before bed
Leo will, on demand:
-Dance
-Clap
-Do "So Big"
-Roll 'em up (as in Patty-cake)
-and Throw 'em in the oven
-Tickle Grandpa's mustache (or a picture of Grandpa's mustache)
-Gesture to something he wants (he's just starting to do this)
Leo communicates by:
-Signing for nursing (which also sometimes means "Mama" and "food" or "comfort" in general
-Shoving his face into my chest (loud and clear, yo)
-Waving "hello" or "goodbye"
Leo says:
-Ha (hi)
-Dehdeh (Mama)
-Dadadadada (Papa)
-Other forms of Dadadadadada while looking at or gesturing to a grandparent
-Also mimics a lot of things we say (the pitches/tones)
-Bbbbbbb (lip trills)
[I never really noticed a "first word," although my dad said he heard Leo say "Papa" to Matt. These are more like little sounds he makes that we just realized are specific in nature. Thus, um, words, I guess.]
Leo recognizes the words:
-Nurse
-Milk
-Hungry
-Mama
-Papa (matt)
-Grandma
-Grandpa
-Mustache (see "Grandpa")
-Nana
-Granddaddy
-Puppy
Leo has traveled to Minnesota (two flight legs) four times (twice just this month) and Texas three times. He is very good on a plane. I think he is so used to it that he just isn't fazed, even though he has just become so mobile.
Leo loves to be outside.
Leo loves dogs and most animals in general.
He sleeps through the night (12 hours) about 70% of the time. The rest of the time, he wakes around 1am and needs to be rocked, patted, or hugged back to sleep.
Leo is very emotional and sensitive. We usually know what is on his mind. He communicates his feelings, wants, desires loudly and with full emotion. He is very, very funny, very goofy, very fun. I really, really like him.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Goodbye
She was less than two weeks from her 85th birthday.
She was a beauty queen, an immaculate hostess, and a mother who raised a family of six without ever learning how to drive a car. She was a businesswoman. I grew up a half mile from her and she never missed a single choir concert, dance recital or spelling bee.
She had thousands of friends. She was hilarious and incredibly smart. She was a devout Catholic. She taught me how to play cards and gloated when she beat me. She used to rub my back to warm me up after I swam in the cold lake in the summer in MN.
She loved music and baking and her family. She hid chocolates and didn't share them with anybody. She made the best cinnamon rolls and the BEST BEST chocolate chip cookies. She sent me home baked goods all through college.
She married her one great true love.
I am proud that I made her a great-grandmother.
Rest peacefully, my beloved Nana. How I will miss you.
She was a beauty queen, an immaculate hostess, and a mother who raised a family of six without ever learning how to drive a car. She was a businesswoman. I grew up a half mile from her and she never missed a single choir concert, dance recital or spelling bee.
She had thousands of friends. She was hilarious and incredibly smart. She was a devout Catholic. She taught me how to play cards and gloated when she beat me. She used to rub my back to warm me up after I swam in the cold lake in the summer in MN.
She loved music and baking and her family. She hid chocolates and didn't share them with anybody. She made the best cinnamon rolls and the BEST BEST chocolate chip cookies. She sent me home baked goods all through college.
She married her one great true love.
I am proud that I made her a great-grandmother.
Rest peacefully, my beloved Nana. How I will miss you.
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